In the Doggerel House

From time to time I will share some doggerel in the form of quatrains with an occasional limerick thrown in for variety.  The subjects will often be authors or literature, but sometimes the focus might be any aspect of modern life that strikes my fancy.  Let us begin with the names of some of the usual suspects.

Orwell’s name was Eric,
Kerouac was not born Jack;
Sometimes authors take their given names
And proceed to give them right back.
Katherine  Anne  Maria Veronica Callista Russell Porter,
That name is longer than most of the others;
When she wore her initials on her sweater,
They had to be continued on her brother’s.  
When T.E. Lawrence adopted a new last name,
Some of his fans began to hew and haw;
A few mumbled curses weak and tame,
Especially the one who said, “Oh, pshaw.”
Some authors treat us poorly,
Some authors keep us guessing;
But of Christopher we will want Morley
While Doris will always be Lessing.
“Do you like Kipling?” asks the man in the wheeze.
“I don’t know. I’ve never kippled,” replies the lass.
That joke has been around for so many years
The Pilgrims knew it before they landed in Mass. 

And these are for the fun-lovers who are also pun-lovers:

There is a woman I know named Candace,
From her lap I lifted her daughter, Sandy;
It was an easy thing to do–
It was taking baby from a Candy.   
If I have any one real quirk, it is this:
I give dogs strange names like Hither and Hahn;
I even named one after a Swedish friend
So I could see two of them running, Hither and Jan.
There’s only one thing I do fear:
A Sir whose armor does not fit tight;
I don’t want to be anywhere near
Things that go bump in the knight.
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